As the days become darker on either side, I have begun to modify my normal routine of running in the woods in the morning. I’m not a big fan of modifying my routines, but I’m practicing acceptance that I probably have to! Basically, I’m trying to make sure that when I enter the forest, I’m not running in the dark.
I don’t know for sure whether any dangers in the woods are worse in the dark this time of year. We do have bears, coyotes, and the occasional cougar in our area. Also, if I can’t see too well, it’s always possible that I might trip over a root or a rock, only to injure myself or break a bone and then be stuck in the woods without help before anyone else in my neighbourhood is even up for the day! These are all possibilities. They are also fears and worries.
One big challenge I think we all face is that we are probably never 100% certain that our fears and worries will not come true. I don’t know whether, as I run through the woods, I might turn a corner and surprise a mother bear with her cub and end up in a life-threatening situation. It hasn’t happened yet, but it could. Similarly, we usually don’t know whether, when we drive to work or other places, we will end up in a horrific car accident, or just maddening traffic. We don’t even know whether, when we are walking down our own steps in our home, we will slip and fall and injure ourselves. When it comes to bad things that could happen, there’s a great deal of uncertainty.
One way to cope with all of this uncertainty is to be practical. If the feared event is somewhat likely to happen, we can take precautions. I bought a headlamp, so I can see better if I end up in the dark woods early in the morning. I can also make sure I have good trail running shoes so I’m less likely to slip and fall, and that I wear a bear bell or otherwise make noise to avoid surprising a large predator. When driving, we can try our best to drive defensively, avoid distractions, and so forth. If we are speaking in front of a group of people and afraid that it won’t go well, we can always be as prepared as possible, practice ahead of time, and remember to pause and take a breath when we get lost in the middle of what we are saying. All of these practical steps can help us prepare for what are inherently uncertain situations.
Another way to deal with uncertainty is to experience and accept it. Consider a situation that you feel uncertain and worried about. See if you can notice with the experience of uncertainty what it is like. Does it show up as a physical sensation in your body? Do you experience certain thoughts going through your mind? Do you feel like doing anything in particular (this is what we call an “action urge” in DBT)? Try to mindfully observe and maybe describe to yourself what the uncertainty feels like. Then, see if you can practice willingness to experience this uncertainty for a little longer than you normally would. See if you might be willing to practice trying to build your tolerance for uncertainty.
Fear, worry, and uncertainty are common human experiences. We all struggle with them. One way to cope with uncertainty is to be practical and take steps to reduce risk. Be careful, though. You could overdo this one. I could, for example, decide that the ultimate way to reduce uncertainty is to never run in the woods altogether. In doing so, I’d be missing out on an activity that I greatly enjoy and value (for its benefits to my health, mood, and energy level). That’s why it can also be helpful to get used to the experience of uncertainty and to balance being practical with accepting this difficult experience that we all have to live with from time to time. ~Alexander L. Chapman, Ph.D., R.Psych.