Dealing with Thoughts

In one of our groups this week, we were discussing ways to manage thoughts that contribute to misery or unwanted, unpleasant emotions. As human beings, we have the amazing capacity to bring to our minds ideas, events, memories, and situations that are not even occurring right now. Through the power of language and mental images, we can think of things that don’t even exist. The problem is that this power sometimes works against us. We worry about bad things that might happen in the future, ruminate about bad things that have happened in the past, make assumptions about how others think or feel about us, blame ourselves or others for unfortunate events, re-live incredibly stressful or traumatic events. Our capacity to think has allowed us to do great things, but it also has allowed us to suffer in a way that (we assume) other creatures don’t. As a result, many types of psychological therapy for mental health problems include strategies to deal with thoughts and thinking patterns. In cognitive, therapy, the therapist often helps the client to step back and examine her or his thinking, evaluate the evidence for and against beliefs, consider the costs and benefits of certain thoughts, and think more flexibly about him or herself, the world, and others. In DBT, we also do this type of work, and Dr. Marsha Linehan has included in her new DBT skills manual (Linehan, 2015) a skill called “checking the facts” designed to help people deal with thoughts. One important step in checking the facts is to step back in your mind and say, “I’m thinking X, Y, Z”. Another important step is to catch judgments, absolutes, musts, or extreme thinking. Your mood and emotions will likely be a lot more stable over time if you walk the middle path between extremes in your thinking. There also are other steps, such as thinking of alternative interpretations of the same situation, considering the worst case scenario and how likely it is, and asking yourself “So what?” “Can I survive that?” and so on. The idea is to try to use the power of your thinking in your own best interest, to let go of negative assumptions, interpretations and judgments that lead you astray, and to think more flexibly. As a first step, try to notice the type of thoughts that are going through your mind. Step back from your thoughts and observe them like cars on a train going by. Examine what kind of thoughts you’re having. Are you worrying, ruminating, judging yourself or others, and so on? Once you have spent some time getting familiar with your thoughts, you’ll have a much easier time figuring out what to do about them. – Alexander L. Chapman, Ph.D., R.Psych.